I am not the arms on the Victory of Samothrace.

I am not the cause of the Peloponnesian War.

I am not Hank Williams.

I am not the book you left on the subway.

I am not a rainbow trout.

I am not repeating: reason over passion.

I am not missing and presumed dead.

I am not saying I love you to a perfect stranger.

I am not 216 colours.

I am not sharing a palette.

I am not going up north on highway 35/115.

I am not Ernest Borgnine in From Here to Eternity.

I am not driving around Toronto like Glenn Gould.

I am not as famous as you.

I am not looking for molybdenite.

I am not green with envy.

I am not a fountain of eloquence.

I am not very good at this.

I am not saying anything until my lawyer gets here.

I am not wearing running shoes to the prom.

I am not going to hang up and try my call again.

I am not getting a migraine.

I am not reaching for my gun.

I am not the discoverer of insulin.

I am not suitable for framing.

I am not going to hang myself just to spite you.

I am not hungover.

I am not in love with Mary Pickford.

I am not going to apologise for cross-posting.

I am not paying for that.

I am not leaving you anything but guilt.

I am not making headway.

I am not spring fed.

I am not checking the spelling.

I am not the victim of union busting goons.

I am not a Great Horned Owl.

I am not going to slay all first born males.

I am not just like someone I read about last week.

I am not going to shake my booty.

I am not a torrential rainstorm.

I am not a welfare Cadillac spraying gravel at the door.

I am not phlegmatic.

I am not an incredibly ugly Flemish lutenist.

I am not Barry White.

I am not Nanook of the North.

I am not Saint Simon Stylite.

I am not Saint John the Dwarf.

I am not Saint John of the Cross.

I am not Saint Joan.

I am not Saint Antony, Saint Collumcille or Saint James.

I am not dreaming of escape.

I am not scopophilic or is it scopophillic.

I am not clutching a six-gun to my chest.

I am not faster, baby, faster.

I am not impressed with the way this is going.

I am not a bad boy.

I am not roadkill barbecue.

I am not going to get stoned in the morning and drunk in the afternoon.

I am not looking for justification.

I am not eating walnuts.

I am not impressed with people who go on and on and on.

I am not standing and waiting at the corner of Queen and Spadina.

I am not a ward of the state.

I am not sleeping on the couch.

I am not cutting my hair like Franz Liszt.

I am not good to the last drop.

I am not an Iroquois warrior.

I am not beating his head against a wall.

I am not joining the French Foreign Legion.

I am not asking questions.

I am not following domestic affairs.

I am not an astronaut floating in space.

I am not 6 feet tall.

I am not dead.

I am not a cartoon character.

I am not talking about guns anymore it's getting embarrassing.

I am not falling for that trick again.

I am not aware of any conflict of interest.

I am not listening to you.

I am not going to rock and roll all night and party everyday.

I am not a cigarette butt in the ashtray of your dreams.

I am not wise in the ways of the force.

I am not Elizabeth Taylor.

I am not Richard Burton.

I am not saying pantaloon in a funny voice at 3 am.

I am not high-speed internet access.

I am not running out of things to say.

I am not dead in a ditch somewhere.

I am not an opera singer though you'd think so by looking at me.

I am not telling the truth.

I am not aware of any precedent.

I am not leaving work at noon.

I am not a scientific American.

I am not the man in a grey flannel suit.

I am not desperately looking for you in a crowd.

I am not comfortable with the habits of a monk.

I am not Norman Vincent Peale.

I am not Norman Levine.

I am not telling anyone.

I am not coming to New York City, can't afford it man.

I am not speaking into a microphone like Fred in Double Indemnity.

I am not standing in your back yard.

I am not throwing my vote away.

I am not a ninja.

I am not a Thuja Occidentalis on the Niagara Escarpment.

I am not fresh as a daisy.

I am not blowin in the wind my friend.

I am not a U-boat captain.

I am not going to hurt you or your friend but the dog's another story.

I am not made in Canada.

I am not a spy.

I am not covered in oil.

I am not moving slowly toward you.

I am not wearing socks.

I am not going to kiss you.

I am not laughing she said.

I am not living in a foreign country.

I am not seeing red.

I am not finished with you yet.

I am not looking for a ride.

I am not part of the X-men.

I am not paying for your drinks.